Friday, September 28, 2007

Straight (Road) Trippin'


I've gone and done it. I'm making the move to ATL. So I crammed all my stuff into a U-Haul, and headed out for the Souf. I've made a few observations along the way. America has a vast array of amazing landscapes. Well, let me rephrase that. Most of everything east of the Rockies, and west of the Mississippi River is remarkably unremarkable. I'm gonna start a petition to get Oklahoma's motto renamed to "We're America's literal taint (taint quite the West Coast, and it taint the East either)." I did, however, eat at the Roadside BBQ tonight, just outside of Memphis, Tennessee. That one plate of pulled pork redeemed America's Taint. I mean, everyone needs a little taint now and again. Earlier today, I was told by a gas clerk in Butthole, Arkansas (who was working towards earning a degree as a pharmacist*) that I would get shot if I moved to Atlanta. This man with the nude woman tattooed on his left arm said this with an uncomfortable level of positivity.

All crap-talkery aside, I've learned a lot about America in just a few short days. Despite how toothless, and assumingly uneducated people are in their various walks of life, everyone has a point of view. And I learned that even amazingly good things can come from the that place where the sun don't shine.

Tomorrow, I'll dine at a Waffle House, and make my final approach to ATL. I plan on throwing my fair share of 'bows while I'm in the 404.

*stifling laughter

7 comments:

Marlow said...

Driving through east central Colorado until half way through Missouri really sucked. I hated everything about those places. Not one positive whatsoever. But then St Louis came along, as well as trees, forest, blue hills, Appalachians, and hotlanta.

erin and shaun said...

Good Luck Adam! Thanks so awesome, I'm glad you decided to do it. I know what you mean. Shaun and I drove to Michigan and back this summer and I have absolutley no nice things to say about Nebraska. It blew.

erin and shaun said...

Obviously the above post is supposed to say THAT'S so awesome. I'm an idiot!

Kelley said...

You are officially hardcore now that you live in the ATL! Halla!

Mike and Joy said...

Blow a kiss to Locust Grove for me. Talk about a nice town*. I am really happy that you took the plunge, I am proud of you!

*stifles laughter

Kristjan Michael Morgan said...

Managuich... cuid your crip side and keep your pimp hand strong. P.S. Stake out a BBQ joint and a blues club. I will plan a proper trip to Hotlanta, and we will get Evan to come up and it will be on.

Evan said...

I will most definitely gear up "The Raft" and make the drive to Splacklanta.