Friday, August 24, 2007

Age-old Questions

Here's some questions I've been thinking about lately. Maybe you've thought the same thing too.

How could Joe Pesci go from being such a putz in Home Alone to such a monstrous badass in Casino?

Why does my milk always seem to go bad the day before the actual expiration date?

How are preseason football rankings really made? Do these guys have an in with Ms Cleo?

Why does Ms Cleo speak with a horrible patois accent?

Who stemmed the horrible stereotype that women from the Caribbean have an unseen portal to the universe- more particularly, if you're doomed for relationship troubles?

Who keeps Cap'n Crunch on the market even though it rips the snot out of the roof of your mouth?

Has anyone filed a class-action lawsuit against Quaker Oats (maker of Cap'n Crunch) for soft palette damage?

Does Lil' Jon charge a per "YEAH" fee, or does he bill hourly?

Why do people enjoy NASCAR so much? (It's so predictable. Left hand turns for 500 miles.)

Perhaps you'll sleep better after finding the answers to these questions. I know I will.

1 comment:

erin and shaun said...

Ha ha! Loved this post! I've been thinking about pursuing that lawsuit but Cap'n Crunch is just too darn good!